Wellbeing: Embracing Isolation and Staying Calm

I realise as I write, that many of you reading this may not be alone, but you will be at home, and you probably won’t be seeing all those people you would usually see or have the human contact which adds to the joy of life.

As we are now well into our third week of lockdown in the UK, we are all finding new ways of working, connecting and getting through the days.  This will be different for all of us.  For some of us, life will have changed dramatically, for others less so.  How ever it is for you, there is no denying we are in a new kind of world where learning new habits and ways of doing things is essential.

There are so may guides out there on how to live in isolation and I don’t particularly feel the need to add to them.  I thought it may be interesting however to share where I’m up to right now and how I am learning to embrace this time of isolation.

How has Life Changed for Me?

My job as a hospital palliative care nurse specialist, means I am still going out to work.  During the week I get up at the same time, I commute in the same way (via bicycle) and do the job I always do with the colleagues I always work with.  Of course that is not the whole story.  The nature of palliative care is sadly, now very focused on end of life care.  I am wearing protective equipment, there are no visitors in the hospital, and I go to work each day with a slight sense of trepidation about what the day will bring.  Hours are a little more unpredictable and staff sickness and shortage is much higher than normal.

Outside of work, life is very different.  As regular readers of this blog will know, I love to be out and about in London.  Visiting galleries and museums and book shops and wandering the streets with my camera is what I do on days off or weekends.  Spending time with family and friends, going to church on a Sunday, shopping, all the things I take for granted are now on hold.  So I am spending more time at home, with just my husband, then I have ever done before.

I don’t know about you but it took me at least 10 days to start to feel vaguely comfortable and work out how to use my time.  I am not someone who is every lacking in things to do, I’m always reading, and always have projects either in my mind or on the go, so rarely feel bored.  And yet despite having more time to do now do them, I initially found it hard to settle to anything very much.  All the advice on productivity, all the extra social media contact, the worry about those I love and the endless super positive advice on how to achieve great things during this time felt a little overwhelming.  Right now I feel more peaceful and calm and have found a rhythm which works for me for the moment.

Below are the ways I have found to live calmly in isolation.

Choosing Carefully What I Read

Books are such a massive part of my life.  When isolation was first talked about, one of my first thoughts was  how many books I would be able to read.  In the beginning, the reality was I found it quite hard to concentrate on anything for very long.  Thankfully this has now improved and I’m enjoying reading at times throughout the day (when I’m at home) when I might not normally read.  I do find I am much more in need of comforting reads.  Books which don’t demand too much, are gentle, but deliver in terms of story to be lost in.  If you haven’t read Ann Tyler, her observational, uncomplicated novels are perfect for now.

Music not News

During days at home it would be very easy to listen to the news or ‘talking’ radio constantly and in the early days I think this is what we did.  Desperate to know any latest change or development, fearful of missing out on something important.  It soon became clear this was not wise.  Becoming saturated in news leads to weariness and anxiety.  So now I try to only watch the news once a day and ignore it for the rest of the time.  Music is much more calming and uplifting.  Scala Radio is the ultimate in calming music.  I also enjoy flicking between radio stations depending on my mood or revisiting music I haven’t listened to for a while from our own collection.

Limiting Screen time and Social Media Use

I love some social media (Instagram!) as much as the next person, and yet I have recently found it can all feel a bit too much.  To begin with I wasn’t sure how to use it. Was it right to post seemingly frivolous pictures of London or wherever else?  What could I possibly say which would be useful or meaningful in a time of such uncertainty and turmoil.  And, how to cope with the flurry of contact.  Zoom calls at work and home suddenly became the norm, Whatsapp went into overdrive and I felt myself spending too much time staring at a screen.  I think because my working days have become pretty intense, in the beginning this was especially tough.  This has settled now and I feel more comfortable again.  I am posting on IG but not necessarily every day.  I still find the connections I have made there really reassuring.  Constant communication has settled down to a more manageable level now we all know where we are, and most importantly in the last few days I have tried to not use my phone after 9pm, particularly for social media.

Becoming More Aware of Nature

I feel very fortunate that my commute is a cycle ride.  This means, no matter what happens I get to be outside for a bit of most days.  With so much less traffic on the road this has become a joy.  That and getting out for a walk or even just spending some time in the garden is a lovely way of connecting with nature.  With fewer distractions I find I am more aware of the changes in the natural world.  The lack of traffic and air craft means I can hear the birds.  There is time to watch the blossom bursting forth and note the changes in light as the days get longer.

Eating Well

This year I have been trying to eat more meat free meals and the prolonged stay at home, and a reluctance to frequent any kind of food shop more than is absolutley necessary has led to an increase in vegetable based meals.  I do miss eating out, but it does mean we are really thinking about what we eat at home and ensuring we have as little waste as possible.  Trying to stay well and eat healthily seems increasingly important now.

Cultivating Creativity

In my ideal world I would have time to do something creative every day. Even now this isn’t the case but I do have more time, especially at weekends and I have been doing more watercolour painting which I do find very calming.  I have followed some great tutorials by the lovely Roxwell Press and also enjoyed watching the IGTV videos on Peggy and Kates instagram account.  My husband bought me a gorgeous hand made calligraphy pen for my birthday so I’m also spending time practicing with that.

Daily Moment of Joy

On my instagram stories I have been trying to post a daily moment of joy.  This has been helpful for me in two ways.  It really makes me think about, and focus on the things which have brought joy and capture them.  It is also my way of collating a collection of ‘joyful moments’ which I want to make into a photo book or books.

Checking in with Family

We don’t live nearby to any of our families so it is not unusual to go some weeks without seeing them.  It is unusual though to know that now we actually can’t see them.  I still find this a challenge, and can’t wait for the day when I can hug them all again.  This enforced separation does mean, we have all got better at checking in with each other regularly. Just knowing they are all ok on a daily basis really does help.

So that’s me.  That is where I’m up to right now.  Like all of us, I’m just doing the best I can to make the most of the time.  I’m trying to embrace the good whilst recognising some days are going to be harder than others.